Friday, August 29, 2008

Happy Medium

Yesterday after Peter was safely on the school bus, Sarah and I went to Wal-Mart.

We headed straight for the toy aisle and looked at every pink toy until I couldn't stand it any longer. Sarah asked for most of them but after I said no, (what felt like a hundred times) was content with just putting them on her Christmas list.

Later on the hair dryer aisle, Sarah decided that I needed the pink hair dryer. I decided that I needed the white hair dryer. Lots of foot stomping and fake whining occurred as I put the white hair dryer in the cart.

Fresh off of her defeat, we headed over to the greeting card section where Sarah demanded that she get to choose the card. Of course, she picked a card that cost $4.99 and sang songs when you opened it. I thought $4.99 was a little excessive for a card (and it was not even very cute) so I told her to put it back.

There was more foot stomping, fake whining and fake tears and a battle ensued between mother and daughter.

Here in the aisles of Wal-Mart for all the bargain shoppers to witness, Sarah was displaying several qualities that I love about her but that also push my buttons.

I love that Sarah is opinionated, stubborn and strong-willed. These qualities will serve her well when she makes her way out in the world. I can rest easy knowing that she is going to be able to make her voice heard and that she will be able to stand up for herself.

However, at this point in time, these qualities are what cause lots of mommy-daughter disagreements.

It was only 9:00 AM and I was already weary of the battles, so I told her that she had made a beautiful choice and put it in the cart. I also put a more affordable (and much cuter) card into the cart.

At the checkout, I slipped Sarah's card to the cashier and whispered that we weren't going to get this one. Sarah never noticed and we were all happy.

I'm sure many people reading this are shaking their heads. But I figure that Sarah and I battle all day long and usually, I win. Every now and then, it's probably o.k. to let her think she won.

I hope I'm not wrong because I don't want a strong-willed, opinionated spoiled brat but I figure there's a happy medium somewhere.

I hope I found it in the card aisle at Wal-mart.

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16 comments:

Debbie said...

I know I love it when people let me think I've won. Hey, if that's the worst you've done as a mom - go right ahead and move to the front of the line! Me - I'll be here in the back.

Keyomi said...

u did the most logical and smart thing! U r awesome!

Gloria said...

I so agree with your happy "medium" solution. As the mother of six grown children I learned early on that you have to pick your battles. My philosophy was to maintain a good relationship with my children. Power struggles don't fit into that picture, especially when they can be sidestepped as you so cleverly did.

What you did preserved her dignity and your sanity. That's a win-win in my book.

Gloria

My Goodness said...

I think that's smart thinking, Mom. We have enough battles everyday...sometimes you have to get creative to 'win'!

Have a great weekend!

Denise said...

Very wise mom.

Heather said...

I would have done the same thing. She'll make a great wife and mom one day. We,as women, have to be opinionated, stubborn and strong-willed to make our households run.

the dragonfly said...

Sounds like a happy medium to me!

Cherish said...

Totally what I would have done

Annikke said...

I do the same thing...often! Recently it bit me in the bum though - I thought, rather than have this battle I will just let her think we are getting it and then not...well we got home and she asked where it was - eeekk! I had to think fast so I pretended not to hear her and eventually she moved on and had forgetten about it...phew!

HappyHourSue said...

I do that all the time, then when she asks for it I blame the checkout lady. Always willing to throw someone under the bus.

Brittany said...

Remember how i said i just replaced my hair dryer? I *GOT* the pink one. lol Tell Sarah if she obeys she can come visit you Ohio bloggy friend, and use the pink hair dryer! ;) haha.

Have a great weekend.

Rebekah said...

Its all about knowing which battles to pick

Steph said...

I use this "trick" all the time, and it works wonders! She's happy (or he..whichever the case may be), I'm happy, and we both think we've won. What could be better?!

Mamasphere said...

I slip stuff to the cashier all the time! ALL the time. It's so much easier than dealing with a screaming preschooler, especially when I can't leave the cart and take her out of the store- I have stuff to do!

Jaina said...

I think you did well with letting her choose the card and slipping it aside. I'm sure you're doing well finding that medium.

Jennifer @ Taking My Time said...

Not shaking my head here. I have the same philosophy.