Thursday, November 8, 2007

I have a problem.

I am an addict and I am ready to admit that I have a problem.

Many of you are probably already aware of Confessions of a Pioneer Woman. If you have never been there, you should visit. It is a wonderful blog and I highly recommend it. She has hundreds of commenters a day from which I can only conclude that she has thousands of readers.

She also has another blog, The Pioneer Woman Cooks. This blog too, is wonderful. She posts pictures of each step of each recipe. And her pictures of the food are gorgeous. At times, I find myself wanting to lick my computer screen. I said I had a problem but believe it or not, that isn't it.

The Pioneer Woman has a recipe for Buffalo Wings which I have never actually made but I will. Some day. I can actually taste these wings when I look at the pictures. But alas, I am very lazy and the thought of getting out the frying pan, and heating up a bunch of oil just seems like soooooo much work to me. (I am now kicking myself for selling my Fry Daddy at a yard sale. And I'm sure if my husband is reading this he is thinking I told you so, I told you so, nah, nah, nah, boo, boo! )

While I was salivating over her wings, I saw her recipe for ranch wing dip. Ahhh, now this is a recipe for me...no frying involved....just a little bit of mixing. That's something I can handle. And handle I did! Let's just say that after a mere two weeks, I am now on my fourth batch of this ranch dip.

I love ranch dressing. I'm not exactly sure when I first had it. The dressings I remember from my childhood are Thousand Island, Green Goddess, Roquefort and Miracle Whip...yes, we actually used Miracle Whip as a salad dressing...I shudder at the mere thought of that now. Once I had ranch dressing I never looked back. Every now and then I will try some newfangled fancy dressing but I always go back to ranch. Always. So I decided that if I was too lazy to make the Pioneer Woman's Buffalo Wings I could at least make her ranch dip.

And make it I did! I started out dipping broccoli. Delicious. And then carrot sticks. Delicious, too. This dip made raw vegetables taste delectable. And I even felt good about myself, because after all, I was dipping vegetables.

Then one night, while watching TV, this dip called to me from the refrigerator. At the same time some tortilla chips called to me from the pantry.

Rescue us. We need to be together. Save us. You neeeeeeed us. Help........

I paused The Office, threw down the remote control, jumped off the couch and ran to them. I had to free them from their prisons. They deserved to be together. Why hadn't I thought of that before?

After I had rescued them, I situated myself back on the couch with the bag of chips in one hand and the bowl of dip in the other and began dipping and eating and dipping and eating and I have not stopped. Why had I been wasting this wonderful dip on vegetables? I wouldn't be making that mistake again.

Four batches of dip and many bags of tortilla chips later, I am wondering why my jeans are too tight and why my muffin top is even fluffier than normal. And is that back fat hanging over my bra? It must be all the dip and chips. Sigh.

They say the first step to beating an addiction is admitting you have a problem. So, I am here today, admitting to the world that I a problem.

Hello. My name is Beth. I am a ranchoholic.

4 comments:

jennwa said...

It is good ranch dressing and you are trying to get me hooked too. What kind of friend are you? You even fed it to my children, shame on you.
To pay you back you can use my Fry Daddy to make wings. But you have to promise to share. My pants are getting tighter just by thinking about it.
You did not even mention her bacon wrapped, cream cheese filled peppers to dip in the ranch. Yummy,the best.
When can I come over to get some.

Honey said...

First I start drooling just by reading your blog about ranch dressing (yes, I am also an addict), then, Jennifer talks about the bacon-wrapped-cream cheese-filled jalapeƱos which are so good it's not even funny...I think I'll go eat my hand now, after I pour some ranch dressing over it!

Annie said...

Love Pioneer Woman! I just made a batch of her cinnamon rolls, and it filled two cookie sheets. I have to go make her ranch dressing now.

Pam said...

Ranchaholic, hahahaha! I haven't made her ranch dressing, but I made her sausage gravy and also her cinnamon rolls. OH MY GOODNESS!!!

Dont' even get me started on her love story. That would make me a BH2TW-aholic!